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- An eight second game of Magic is good!
- You can always find someone to play Magic with you.
- Your opponent won’t ask you if you’ll still respect them in the morning.
- A game of magic ALWAYS ends simultaneously.
- Magic requires no foreplay; you can just grab a partner and start playing.
Good sex can cost you $1000, but a Black Lotus will only cost you $250.
– remark: both prices are out of date –
- Protective card sleeves are easier to put on than condoms.
- You can switch opponents as often as you like, and no one will mind.
- A game of Magic can last for hours.
- You don’t have to cuddle after a game of Magic.
- Brutally beating your partner is okay.
- Protection really works.
- Magic comes with a rulebook.
- Parents don’t go crazy when they catch their children playing Magic with the neighbor’s kid.
- You can play Magic while eating a sandwich.
- If your deck just isn’t working, you can blame it on the shuffle.
- Any number of people can play in a game of Magic, and everyone gets a turn.
- When you pay for Magic, you’re guaranteed of a good time.
- You can always get your partner to play Magic with you in public.
- When you buy Magic, you know it’s fresh from the factory.